Your husband had this addiction, or the proclivity toward it, before he ever met you, regardless of what he says.In spite of what you think or even what he might have said, nothing you could do could be enough to sexually satisfy your porn addicted spouse.You don’t realise they are lessening their responsibility, managing down your expectations, and telling you that you have the wrong end of the stick.“This isn’t a relationship so whatever you’re reading into things, it doesn’t hold the same meaning for me.If the person appears to behave like they’re in a relationship by exhibiting the hallmarks of one such as spending time with you, sleeping together, introducing you to people, acting like you’re in a relationship, but then says that they don’t want to commit, that you’re “just friends” or ‘Friends With Benefits’, or denies that you’re even together, or says they’re not ready, their cat’s stuck up a tree, they haven’t got clean drawers, their budgie died when they were five, or whatever, if you continue, you’re ignoring the fact that their words don’t stack up with what you believed to be the actions of a relationship.
I see so many people practically getting a Ph.d in investigating what someone said but didn’t back up with words, or investing themselves in something that looks like a relationship but the other party has said things to the contrary, that I felt it was time to break it down.
It is possible for your husband to love you, even though he is looking at pornography. This is a benefit when a man is fighting in a war and able to focus on the task at hand without worrying about his family back home.
But it also makes a man able to look at pornography without thinking about how it may hurt you or his marriage.
At the height of his addiction, nothing, not even the risk of losing his job or his marriage, is enough to stop him.
This explains how a politician or celebrity can make such risky, career-destroying moves without stopping to consider the consequences.
Later I will discuss the kinds of consequences that can catapult an addict into reality.